It’s a Grand thing
The way I see it, it is fitting that grandparents and their grandchildren should, at times, be left alone together. For though they are separated by a generation, the two have more in common than meets the eye.
Like the sunrise and sunset, who at opposite times of the day are able to witness the stars shining in a deep blue sky- that the preoccupied late morning and the fatigued late afternoon miss entirely…poor things. The way spring and fall on either side of the busiest season complement each other. For spring is all anticipation and excitement, newborn grass, and butterflies. No “savoir faire” whatsoever, one moment confident and blustery and the next timid and uncertain. Yet, fall, being in full possession of the wisdom that seasons of experience has bestowed, is not at all flustered by spring’s giddiness. Patient and settled, autumn sits back and enjoys the show, knowing spring will grow out of it all too soon. Fall’s counsel? “Distinguish the small faults from the significant ones and wink at them. Spring is trying to figure it all out in one brief moment of time. Lots of rain in the spring and a whole lot of blustery wind, for nothing ever seems impossible in spring, you know.”
It was late August, just as the ninth month of the year approached to draw the curtain on summer, when I was asked to stay with our two granddaughters while their parents traveled far, far away across the ocean. To another country entirely. Another time zone. And they entrusted me to be left alone with their precious offspring. Well, what can I say? The girls and I would have to endure it the best we could. (Insert laughing emoji-the one with the tongue sticking out). Now wait just a minute, I don’t want you to think I am one of those “As soon as the parents leave so do the rules” grandparents- nothing could be farther from the truth!
I have standards.
I have rules.
Like bedtimes, for example. I had bedtimes for them…but they were negotiable. The actual bedtime depended on a number of rational, sensible, and logical things. Such as, what we were in the middle of doing, eating, watching, or playing. These things matter in the grandparent scheme of life and are of far greater importance than what the disapproving red digital numbers on the oven clock are showing.
Case in point:
You just cannot close up the Game of Life and heedlessly throw all the pieces back in the box when Molly already had to use two cars because she had seven children and was spinning to see whether she would have triplets! See what I mean? How could I do that to her! At a time such as that bedtime must be negotiable!
If you were in the middle of a profound and insightful conversation with your 17-year-old granddaughter-your first-born grandchild- surely, you would not just send her off to bed simply because it was approaching one a.m., would you? Yet, in my defense– that is exactly what happened to me! We were just finishing a bowl of popcorn when Madi began telling me about a wedding she recently attended where, at the reception, a woman seated at her table took a huge bite out of a cupcake and ended up with frosting all over her nose! Think with me people! Go back in your minds to the days when you were the tender age of seventeen! Would not that be one of the worst possible things that could happen to you when-there you were-all dressed up at wedding! (Now you see why I just had to stay up and listen!) But it gets better because, of course Madison just felt compelled to point this out to the frosting nosed woman… (I mean, come on-wouldn’t you want to know if you had yellow frosting on your nose in public?) and do you know what the woman actually did? (Brace yourself) When Madison thought she would have at the very least picked up her napkin and discreetly wiped away the frosting… the woman took out her phone and took a selfie! What in the world!
Madison found this so extraordinary that we just had to talk it out…and by 2:15 a.m. we had sufficiently put ourselves and the topic of the woman at the wedding to bed. The struggle is real.
One fine day we ventured over to the Minnesota State Fair. Out of all the State fairs our country has each year, this is the one that always comes up with the new and sometimes bizarre fair foods. They are the originators of all things deep fried-from Snicker’s bars to deep fried bubble gum and candied bacon doughnut sliders- basically anything you can throw into hot oil. (I have always attributed the Minnesotans unusual capacity to create such things as “deep fried butter” to the lengthy days and nights afforded them during their merciless long winters.) When we arrived, we immediately spotted a long and winding line leading to a small yellow stand. “Delicious Hot Sugared Mini-Donuts” the sign above the stand blazed and boy were they! We ordered a bag full of the little marvels and devoured them right there on the corners of Judson Avenue and Underwood Street. Sooooo unlike the three of us to do such a thing in public, but the thousands of people all around us were all eating something too-so we were confident they did not notice us. Next, Madison suggested, through sugar coated lips, that we journey over to the newborn farm animal exhibit. When we arrived at the building, the first presentation we came across was a pen inhabited by a massive mother pig who had, only moments before, given birth to seventeen pink piglets! Molly thought the mother was dead-the way she was just lying there surrounded by all of her ravenous children and was wishing she only had a stick to poke her and see…But soon the sow gave out a rather violent snort, which frightened about twelve of her little one’s half to death and sent them scurrying. “Where’s the dad?” Molly wanted to know, “Maybe they could put some of the piglets with him to give the mother a break?” A novel idea, thought I…
We strolled the length and breadth of the fair for miles and hours, drinking in the sights and sounds; sampling tacos, “The World’s Best Brownies”, and a one-foot-long corn dog as we went, when all too soon we were headed to the car for the five- hour drive home, laughing, singing, and talking all the way. When we arrived there at midnight, another set bedtime had to be negotiated as we all found we were not the least bit tired but rather exhilarated from the day’s events and thus, decided we should all meet downstairs on the couch, with blankets and tea and watch a mindless Hallmark movie until we fell asleep. Which we did…very late New York time-choosing to ignore the obnoxious oven clock which in vain tried to alert it was already way into tomorrow!
The next day we decided we ought to put our hands to some work around the house, since up until that day we had basically just frolicked. You see, I always try to help Jen with some projects around the house when I visit, and this time would be no exception. That morning, as the girls and I sat together in the family room, I asked them what that pathetic looking basket was on the shelf next to their tv. “Well,” Molly piped up as she jumped to her feet to go retrieve it, “this is our candy basket” and held up an Easter Kit Kat! Now mind you-this was the last day of August! (This is just one of the reasons why it is vital for me to go up there whenever I can! For some reason unknown to me these “seemingly trivial” projects just escape Jen’s attention…and really-between us-she’s been raised better than this! Insert mind-blowing emoji). So, we decided we would roll up our sleeves and get to “work”. (This would be good for the girls to have a workday.) To begin with, I told Molly to go throw away the entire basket-especially since she came across a Reese’s Valentine heart! Next, we all got dressed, hopped in the car and headed off to the town about forty minutes away, where there were a number of stores with stockpiles of fresh, fall candy. Thirdly, we searched for a larger, sturdier basket which would hold the new provisions. Hours later when we arrived back home, we still had work to do. I watched as the girls opened all the new bags, placed all the little candy bars, small bags of gummy bears and Tootsie pops into the new basket, and carried all the empty bags to the trash. Whew! What a day!
After this, because we had still not eaten, we had a late lunch of what all girls and women have when there are no men folk around hankering to be fed: cheese, crackers, grapes, and iced tea-and we settled in to watch yet another mindless Hallmark movie, our candy basket overflowing in the distance.
I have numerous instances about which I could tell you, but since my daughter reads this paper I am sensing I have already said too much…suffice it to say, wise and loving grandparents have a way of sprinkling stardust over and around their grandchildren, praising and celebrating them even in the presence of all the imperfections their parents allege they possess. As for Madison, Johnny, Molly, Jack, Bear and Carter-I intend to make sure there is plenty of stardust to go around!
Thank you for reading!
Liz
