It was said of Jesus in Luke chapter four verse two: “And all bare him witness and wondered at the gracious words which proceeded out of his mouth…” Think with me for a moment about the gracious words Christ used with such a diversity of people who, in more than a few cases least deserved it: “Daughter! Be of good cheer.”

“Son! Thy sins be forgiven thee.”

“Come unto Me all ye that labour and are heavy-laden. And I will give you rest.”

“But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered”

“Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.”

“Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?”

“Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid”

Gracious, thoughtful, and uplifting words. They are not ingratiating words. Those who use ingratiating words use flattery to seek to bring themselves into someone’s favor. Christ always spoke the absolute truth and we should want to model him. Our friend Charles Spurgeon wrote, “O, there is nothing that can so advantage you, like the imitation of Jesus Christ.” Amen.

Graciousness is a difficult word to define, yet isn’t it true that we all know when we are in the presence of a gracious person? Graciousness is a character trait that goes a long way in our society and people easily pick up on it because it is rare. It is not something high on the list of modern values, and regrettably, it is not always common among Christians, but it ought to be. Within a biblical context, graciousness is the influence of God’s grace on the life of the believer and the reflection of it to others. Therefore, it is selfless and charitable. Gracious people put those with whom they converse at ease, as they walk through life with a composure and awareness that few possess. Consider how Christ was so approachable! Matthew Henry claims his words would melt the hearts of the hearers as they marveled at him! No one- not a child, a centurion, a leper, a blind man, a sinner, a woman caught in adultery, a demon-possessed woman, a scholar, a lawyer, a guilty, crucified, dying thief, or a desperate woman pleading for the life of her daughter and so many others ever felt intimidated by him, and we should follow Christ’s example.

It has been said that the lack of graciousness in our society is generated by fear and anxiety. But I disagree. That philosophy gives too many people an out for bad behavior. I believe pride is the cause of an ungracious and unchristlike attitude. The self-righteous person thinks more highly of himself than he ought to.

“For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” Romans 12:3

According to the Bible, it just comes naturally for us to think too highly of ourselves, even to love ourselves. A good Christian will be mindful to keep these things in check. And yet there is an opinion of self that exceeds natural boundaries. It is excessive and instinctively breeds arrogance, which leads to indifference to others. There is no need to expound upon the glaring example of an inflated sense of self-importance attached to most social media platforms, so we will limit our thoughts to everyday examples of too much self.

One day our Lord was asked what the greatest commandment was.“ Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.”

Now these two Commandments are the foundation of all the rest, you see, and to love our neighbor, our brother, whom we have seen, is evidence of our love to God, whom we have not seen, so the worthy Apostle John enlightens us. So gracious Christians will, due to our regenerated nature, be mindful of our attitudes, words, and actions toward one another. Consider the following:

A gracious woman will always think before she speaks:

Christians should tread lightly when it comes to sharing our exalted opinions about a situation in which some distressed or troubled soul may find themselves. Sometimes, regardless of how a person may seem to be managing a problem on the outside, their very soul is on its knees and even truthful things can be overbearing for someone to hear. At other times, an opinion intended to be some kind of help can be very painful or bring about additional suffering if the one offering it is not mindful to be led by the Spirit. Often timing is everything, and yet some things are better left unsaid. We might assume we know the entire scope of the predicament, but in actual fact, we may comprehend very little and consequently, we can draw some pretty

inaccurate conclusions. Put it to you this way. I grew up around a lot of blue-collar workers. My father was a welder, an uncle had his own plumbing business, another worked for the Post Office and one was a Nassau County Police Officer. Hard-working men who labored with other hard-working men who knew a thing or two. It seemed to me from my wide-eyed, youthful perspective that whenever these men got together someone would mention a guy at work who was a “Sledgehammer tongue.” That always intrigued me because, from a young child, I knew what damage a sledgehammer was capable of and this is why. My father was always building or repairing something around the house. One Saturday morning I sat watching him as he used a sledgehammer to break up some concrete in the yard. Sledgehammers are large, heavy hammers often used for demolition. Well, my father missed the concrete in one of the blows of the hammer and smashed his thumb! Talk about a crime scene! And I remember that for months afterward, his thumb still throbbed with pain. It is the same with sledgehammer tongue people. They crush the ones they come down on. Many times unintentionally, yet they take it for granted that what they feel compelled to share just hits the nail on the head. However, it is not always necessary to pass judgment or give a commentary on someone who is facing a challenge. There are times when it just inflicts further embarrassment or heartache. Like rubbing coarse salt in a wound. You know, making a difficult situation worse for someone.

Scott Kuzel, a great friend of ours and missionary to South Africa is visiting with us as I write this. It is early morning and we are sitting in the back room of our home chatting away, solving the world’s problems. I told him the story of the sledgehammer and my thoughts about those who can be sledgehammer tongues. He responded, “Liz, why do you think some people are like that? Is it just because they are rough around the edges?” (Which was such a gracious thing for him to say compared to what I’m about to say so, allow me to apologize in advance…) I replied that I thought there were two reasons. The first is plain old thoughtlessness. Some people just feel compelled to share whatever pops into their little, tiny heads. Truly, they haven’t the slightest idea of the depth of heartache or gravity someone may be facing, and yet, the lack of discretion; the imprudence of some people can be jaw dropping. Surely we have all known people like this. You are experiencing a personal crisis and someone feels compelled to hold you hostage and assure you she knows exactly how you feel because once her aunt had an awful ingrown toenail…(Do you find me in jest?         I genuinely had someone say that to me once when my world was caving in…please insert head-smacking emoji). What in the wide world! Folks like that make you shake your head and move on. But the second reason is some presume to understand the depth of the hurt or apprehension you may be living through and then proceed to spout their lofty ideas about why you are having those troubles. Gasp! This is much harder to bear. I have known people like this, haven’t you? You spy with your little eye from across a crowded room that they are headed straight for you, and, they have a sermon prepared. And you are trapped. And girls, let it be shouted from the housetops: this is just not helpful. Look, for what it is worth here is how I see it:

1. The best people encourage you and love you.

2. The great ones help you to look to the Lord.

3. And the ones who are so sensitive to the Spirit’s prompting, those who understand that sometimes there are just no words– will look at you from across the room and make that beautiful heart shape with their hands and sometimes, that is more than enough.

Graciousness is marked by humility, the foundation of all Christian virtues. Someone has said it is not thinking less of yourself as much as thinking of yourself less. Humility is the correct assessment of self; therefore, this virtue helps us to be intuitively wise in our approach to people.

Graciousness is especially important when you have the upper hand. Where there is an imbalance of power, so to speak. You can tell a lot about a person by what they do when they have the advantage. Some people have tongues as sharp as a serpent’s tooth and they are quick to strike. Often they have an agenda. When you are gracious you quickly recognize when someone is vulnerable and you do what you can to put them at ease. It means you allow others to “save face” because Christians are not vengeful. We do not look for ways to get back at someone or get even, verbally, or otherwise. It should never bring us joy to see anyone else squirm or suffer, nor should we anticipate it even when they have done us wrong. “Rejoice not when thine enemy falleth, And let not thine heart be glad when he stumbleth:” Proverbs 24:17

Gracious people are also known for being tactful.  And really, at the core of graciousness is the way we make others feel. That is why a gracious person thinks before she speaks. We carefully weigh our words. Christian tactfulness is the ability to avoid giving offense. It is to be spiritually skillful in situations where other people’s feelings must be considered. It is to use discretion– that strong sense of what is right and appropriate. Someone has said, “It is tact that is golden…not silence.” I just love that.

The Bible teaches that a gracious woman retains honour. Her reputation and dignity remain intact, which speaks volumes of her Christian character. She is an example of the believers in word and conduct. And graciousness leads the way as her own works praise her in the gates.

Thank you for reading,

– Liz

Fall also leads me to recall that we are headed into our fourth winter with our home-grown chickens. It all just seems like only yesterday…It was at the onset of the Covid pandemic when the entire world was upside down, I got the brilliant idea that we should raise chickens. (I say “we” because I knew I would have to enlist our daughter Ashley to help me pull it off.) Chickens, I presumed, cannot be too expensive to keep. I mean, what do they eat? Grass?  Insects? Additionally, we would have the benefit of fresh eggs-people can survive on eggs-and if the economy tanked we could survive on the chickens as a last resort! Well, that was my thinking back a few years ago. I remember it all so clearly now…

One evening back then, I approached my good husband. “Honey, I really need to have some kind of project to do-something more than cleaning, organizing-right now I have the cleanest house in Holtsville…” He looked up from his reading, glasses perched on the end of his nose. “Sure” he breezily responded, “I think that’s a good idea-what do you want to do?” “Well,” I pitched my proposal, “I think it would be an enjoyable venture-an easy project, (Boy-would those words ever come back to bite me!) and a great experience for our grandsons Johnny and Carter if we raised some chickens. Right now the world just seems so unnatural and upside down…I just think we should get back to the simple life, do something pioneering, have something constructive and rewarding to look forward to each day…” Just as easily he answered it would be fine with him, in fact, a clever idea, he thought. He even went so far as to say he would look into either purchasing or building us a coop.  Wow! I was in business!    Now all I had to do was convince Ashley…

I found her sprawled across the couch in the back room on her phone searching for stores that still carried paper towels.

“Ash,” I tactfully approached her, “Would you ever feel like doing a little project with me?” “Sure, of course,” she replied without looking up from her phone. “Well,” I began, “I think it would be a great thing-and really-a good thing for Johnny and Carter if…um…I…we… raised our own chickens?” Without a moment’s hesitation, she sat up straight, looked up at me through squinted eyes, and asked, “Why on earth would you ever want to do a thing like that?!” I was completely shot out of the saddle.

“Well, I thought it would be something we could try, it would be good for the boys, and I mean, we’ll have fresh eggs every day…” I pleaded. She put down her phone and cocked her head, still looking at me through squinted eyes. “Mom, I mean, I don’t know…it’s going to be a lot of work. Like, do you really think you’ll even eat the eggs?” I hadn’t considered that one. “Well, I think daddy and Johnny and Carter will…” Pleeeease say you’ll help me!” I begged her.

Within months we were the proud owners of an adorable little flock whom we nurtured straight from the shell. And as expected the day arrived when they finally began laying. Our grandson Johnny happened to be over at our house and brought in the first freshly laid eggs from the coop. “Hey Grammy! Here’s your first batch of fresh eggs!” “Oh! Great!” I exclaimed, making an admirable attempt to sound enthusiastic over the little brown, speckled things-although the thought had crossed my mind as to whether or not it was safe to eat the very first batch? I mean, would they somehow be like a weird little practice batch? We cracked one into a bowl. You never saw such a big,

orange yolk-I mean-I don’t know what to compare it to-maybe a canned peach? Johnny and I took one look at it and both said at the same time-“There’s no way I can eat that thing…” Johnny quickly added-“And the gross thing is Grammy-touch it-it’s still warm…”        I thought one of us would pass out right there. We put the eggs in a basket and immediately washed our hands. Now what? We both turned and looked at Carter. He said he was game and so I fried up a few for him. Johnny and I stood there and watched him. Carter claimed they were, “The best eggs I ever ate in my whole life!” (But he is also the child who had no moral compunction about climbing inside the coop and combing through the “well-used” hay to retrieve eggs. He even told me he’d like to sleep in there one night because he liked the smell of the coop…) My husband was all for eating the eggs assessing it would be one way to recoup -no pun intended- some of the money he had shelled out-no pun intended- for them.

Well now, fast forward a few years. We are the owners of six enormous, free-ranging, free-loading, Buff Orpington British breed chickens who act like they allow us to live here. I say Guv’na! And Ashley, who was so opposed to the idea in the first place-has taken them under wing– pun intended– adores them and has gone so far as to give them British names-Beatrice, Juliet, Fanny, and so on.  She claims she knows each one by name despite the fact the rest of our family knows they look identical to each other. She adores the things but exploits them by using them to produce satirical videos.  Allow me to explain. She will gather all of them together, call out football numbers-“22-46-37-Hike!” and send a football sailing across the yard. At which point, the chickens (who were born to play Cricket–not football-come on, Ash!) take off after the ball- half running half flying-wings flapping and feathers everywhere. And as she videos them, she will take particular care to zoom in on Beatrice-the one with one short leg who has this weird, half-hop half-flying thing going on.  She also upon occasion sings them to sleep at night through their chicken-wired windows and assures us they all softly “cluck-sing” back to her-and we allllllll believe her…(insert “eye rolling” emoji…)

It may be presumptuous of me to assume there are those among my readers who find they are somewhat tempted to pursue poultry farming. If that is the case, as a friend, may I offer you some unsolicited advice?

  1.Do not build a coop! Unle$$ you are married to Elon Mu$k and po$$e$$ a net worth of $235 billion, a$ it will co$t you a$ much a$ adding a $pare room on your hou$e. You can ea$ily a$$emble  the one$ you can purcha$e online and $ave your$elf the buck$!

2. Do not scramble-no pun intended-to build nesting boxes either. Chickens don’t care about nesting boxes. They only use them in the movies. Even if you put up a blazing neon sign with an arrow above the boxes that reads, “Free Mealworms if you Lay Eggs Here!” they will lay them all over the coop-or under the nearest shrub.

3. Do not waste your money on fancy marketing maneuvers aimed at well-meaning but naïve raisers of chickens. I have tried to convince Ashley that the creatures for which she is buying, “Chicken snax!  With tasty granola, dried cranberries, nuts, and peanut butter!” and feeding homemade banana bread, are the same ones keeping our yard’s population of June bugs, grubs, Gypsy moths at bay. I’m sorry but there’s no possible way our chickens have taste buds!

4. With all the supplies you will purchase regularly for your flock, such as hay, shavings, grain, etc., even if eggs go up to $30 a dozen, it will still be cheaper for you to buy them!

5. Be in the know about the local hawk population for your area, because I can assure you-since you got chickens-they are in the know about you! Find that unsettling? Once I did too. But what I find more unsettling is that Ashley has learned to recognize hawk shrieks and it matters little whether we are all seated at the table and just about to pray over Thanksgiving dinner, or, in the middle of an earthquake, if she even thinks she hears a hawk she drops whatever she’s doing and races off to rescue the flock, picking up some large, blunt object along the way.

6. Of great importance! Get yourself ready for winter. Why? Because your chickens -with their layers of feathers are warmer than you could ever be even if you wore three coats!  And if it so happens to snow nine feet overnight you will not only be the one shoveling the driveway and front walkway up to your house you will also be digging out a path to the coop.  And once you excavate the mound of snow piled up against the coop door and shovel your way through the run- if you haven’t had a heart attack by then-you might have one when you

discover that chickens hate the snow- and they won’t even put one of their creepy looking little claws out to feel the ground much less step out onto it. Their heads may be small but they still have brains. Which may be something you find worth considering as you drag your frozen body back to the house.

7. And last of all, if you have enjoyed the esteem and friendly camaraderie that comes with being a respected homeowner in your neighborhood-those days are over! Sunrise is like an ancient, pagan trigger for all chickens to squawk like they are being chased by a pack of coyotes, the volume of which rivals the local fire department’s siren. And if you don’t hightail it out to open the coop door at the crack of dawn each and every day-rain-snow-shine or tornado-your neighbors will let you know it!

I hope you enjoyed reading about the joys of raising chickens, I’d like to write a few lines more, but alas, we are on our way to the Tractor Supply Store to purchase another 50-pound bag of feed-which should last about two days…

Thanks for reading!

-Liz

(Personal disclosure: What on earth was I thinking by patting a stranger on the back! In an instant it came to me that my good husband often ribs me about my perpetual back patting– as if somehow I imagine that little touch will make everyone and everything okay…funny thing though, both of our girls have told me,  “Oh, but it does mom…”(insert heart emoji!)

We went along, side by side toward the elevators when he stopped, turned to me, and said,  “This is some beautiful day. But it seems I’m at the point in my life where every beautiful day turns out to be just another trip to the doctor…”  I patted him on the back once again. “I know, I know…” I answered as I met his gaze with understanding. “I know how that can seem.” He reached out and pushed the button to call for the elevator. Little could he have imagined the pathos rising within me.  Truly, I understood his meaning.

As we waited I studied him closely. He was perfectly dressed, even his shoes were polished. Beautiful jacket and a neat, collared shirt peeking out from beneath it. He turned to me once more and continued, “But you know, you can never let it get you down. You can’t let it overwhelm you. You have to keep moving forward one foot in front of the other and then, well, at the end of the day, we just do our best knowing everything is in God’s hands.”

My eyes were so filled with tears that I could not answer this person I had never met before, so I just stood there nodding and of course, I continued to pat the gentleman on the back.

The elevator opened, he gestured toward it and said, “Ladies first.” I stepped in, intending to turn to him and make some kind of effort to acknowledge his remarks but when I turned, he was still standing outside the elevator as the doors closed. He gave an almost smile, put his hand up as if to say goodbye, and that was it.

Alone in the elevator I genuinely began to wonder if he was an angel for several reasons. Number one, I still found it hard to believe he could have thrown open that colossal door himself.  Secondly, his appearance was impeccable- not one hair out of place on this gusty day. Last of all his spiritual insight. I mean, this is New York, not some Bible Belt state down south, where even the guy who pumps your gas will slap your car when he’s done and call out, “Okay, y’all-have a great day! Lord bless ya!”  His words were not only meaningful to me, but at that moment-on that day-my heart was so overwhelmed as I was attempting to process an enormous amount of self-talk and speculation and concerns…trying to keep each assailing conjecture in his own lane; endeavoring to decide which thoughts were groundless to begin with! I would imagine some of my readers know the process. It is as if I have to stop everything, call a meeting of all my thoughts, and address them:

“Okay everyone- just calm down, everyone be quiet- I know you all have concerns so I’m going to address them now:

You- fatalist-you’re first. You’re the one who’s always telling me how it’s all over and how there is no possible good outcome-but the truth is you don’t know that! Only God knows the outcome, so we’re not going

there…go to your room and don’t come out…

And you-the weeping prophet-you’d have me locked in my bedroom crying and moaning all day-why even get dressed or eat? Why even bother with anyone or anything? You want me to focus on myself all day long but I want you to know that I have decided that is too high a cost for me to pay-you’re done…

Lastly, I want to address three of you together- doubt, self, and fear– you three gang up on me and are absolutely the worst! You try to reinforce beliefs of hopelessness and despair… but how dare you tempt me not to trust God? The last thing I need in this trial is to listen to any of you-you’re finished!

Well, anyway, I have found self-talk can be regulating as it helps me place my faith in God and focus on gratitude, worship trust, and prayer.

Now, I know the Bible says it is entirely possible for us to be in the presence of angels yet be unaware of such a marvelous thing.  Then again, perhaps he was an ordinary man who just needed someone to talk to at that moment and I just happened to be there. I once read a little quote that often comes to mind, “Everyone,” it said, “is fighting some kind of battle…be kind.” Seems like the words “Be Kind” are emblazoned on everything from coffee cups to tee shirts. Kindness is good. But we could add other words as well: be aware, be in the moment, be thoughtful, be gracious, be selfless, be still…

When I arrived at my floor and stepped out of the elevator, for a split second I thought about turning around and heading right back downstairs to see if I could find the gentleman. If anything only to tell him how powerful his words were to me on that day, and that as a Christian I do believe that all the events of our lives are in God’s hands and, more importantly, that I am in his hands. Nevertheless, appointments must be kept; there is always the tyranny of time, so I hurried to where I was to go.

Later, back downstairs as I exited the building I found the door was a breeze to throw open. Outside the sun was still shining as brilliantly as before but the wind had calmed down considerably, no longer a force with which to be reckoned. That was a relief. The people hustling and bustling exiting and entering that office building wore varied expressions; mostly pensive; as if lost in thought.  Some walked in earnest, some in apprehension.  Everyone bearing some kind of burden, each one headed through the same door to different doorways, which led to different rooms and, doubtless, different outcomes.

It is often a tightrope walk, this life. As for me, my step was lighter-though not one burden I was carrying when I first entered the building had been lifted. However, they shifted position to Someone who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all I could ever ask or think, which made the load effectively lighter. Funny thing, it took the candor of a stranger to remind me and admonish me with that great, sustaining truth; God is faithful. The goodness of God in the life of a Christian is everywhere. We only need to shift our focus to acknowledge it.

“…when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

Thank you so much for reading,

-Liz

The first thing we must understand about this passage is that Jesus was not speaking about salvation. He was teaching with respect to humility; what is more, there never was an equal Master Educator of it! Those who contend that little children can be saved using this as a proof text are wrong. These children did not come up to our Lord concerned for their souls as Nicodemus once did. No one came burdened by their sin debt like Zacchaeus.  Not a one cried out as the Philippian jailor, “What must I do to be saved!” Christ was teaching the disciples a fundamental principle of the Christ like life; the child was the object lesson.

So let us consider the context and the scene.

Now mind you, the disciples, bless their hearts, were debating about which one among them was the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven, those who were the saved on earth at that time. Who was, they were desirous to know, the outstanding one-the supreme Christian? They did not ask what spiritual character traits would be considered the greatest, or if the Lord could recommend what each of them individually should work on in order to strive

to be an asset to the kingdom. Peter, James, and John had only just returned from a high mountain where they saw Christ transfigured; his person, his raiment in blinding, blazing light before them. Moses appears on one side-Elijah on the other and they begin to speak with Christ. Peter, for some absurd reason, aligns himself with these three who are conversing and pitches a building plan for the mount. A bright cloud overshadows them and God the Father speaks, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased; hear ye him.” Matt. 17:5. The disciples fell flat on their faces struck with great fear. When they looked up, Christ alone was with them, and so they began the long trek back down the mountain. Waiting for them at the foot of the mount is a desperate father with a demon possessed son. He runs to Christ and asks for help for his boy, declaring that Christ’s disciples could not deliver. Christ addresses his disciples: “Then Jesus answered and said, O faithless and perverse generation, how long shall I be with you? how long shall I suffer you? bring him hither to me.” Immediately the Lord casts the demon out of the boy and he is cured. A few moments later the disciples kind of tip toe up to Jesus apart from the onlookers and ask why they fell so short of the power they needed. Christ’s answer was concise-it was because of their unbelief. Not long after Christ began to tell the disciples of the sorrow and suffering that was before him. The disciples listened and were sorry. Yet, the Bible says at the same time they were disputing among themselves who would be the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven! They had just seen Christ transfigured-actually saw and heard Moses and Elijah-and heard the voice of God the Father! They must have been speechless all the way down the mountain! Even Peter! And then-when Christ comes and heals that boy-I mean, should not they have all been speaking of the incomparable Christ? But no…they want to know who is the star among them. Moreover, they are supposing that, surely one or two of them have got to be among the top picks. After all, these are the disciples; the ones who have left all to follow Christ.   Could it be Peter? Christ had just recently given the keys to the kingdom to this most outspoken disciple. 

Judas was the treasurer. That’s a position of trust in the church.  Could it possibly be him?

What about John, the beloved disciple? Who could argue

that choice? And yet, James was the Lord’s half-brother-surely that has to go some distance. Andrew, however, was the first disciple to be called and to follow Christ-maybe in the Kingdom he could have the title of, “Andrew, The Very First One.”

The answer Christ gives to his disciples is really a rebuke as he condemns the very thought of such a question. Had Christ intended to choose one of them as an example he would have. But no. He calls an innocent, little child to him and places him right in the center of the disciples. Right where everyone can focus his attention on this little one. Now picture a child back two thousand years ago. Let us suppose it was a little boy. Typical Bible days clothing. Maybe some rough kind of fabric fashioned into a little tunic. Very likely barefoot, hair all scruffy and windblown-(no hairspray or mousse)…a beautiful, middle eastern, tan complexion. And here he is- the center of attention. This was not an illustration of salvation. This was a portrayal of humility! Christ begins his reprimand: “Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted…” The word as used in this context means to turn oneself from one’s current course of conduct. Jesus was not speaking to the disciples about being saved. No. Eleven of them were saved. But eleven of them were a far way off from where they needed to be.  Christ was teaching that one must be converted from thinking way too highly of himself. You must be of another mind; these are not the thoughts of one who desires to be a servant in the Kingdom of God, who serves others in the fear of the Lord. The pride, conceit, and vanity which is so obvious in you must be repented of now.  Our friend Matthew Henry puts in beautifully: “Besides the first conversion of a soul from a state of nature to a state of grace, there are after-conversions from particular paths of sin. Every step out of the way by sin, must be a step into fellowship again by repentance. When Peter repented of his denying his Master, he was converted.”        The life-long responsibility of the Christian is to yield to the Spirit of God and walk in humility toward God and others.

Christ also told them, “…and become as little children.” When we are first saved we are possessed of that genuine, trusting belief in Christ. Whatever God tells us, whatever he wants, we are so willing to forsake all and trust him. I teach a class every Wednesday night to the youngest children in our church.  Among

these is an adorable three-year-old, named Nathan. Once recently,   as I was teaching a lesson about The Lost Sheep-Nathan stood up, looked at all of his little fellow classmates and said, “Kids! We really need to follow God’s will for our lives!” Out of the mouths of babes! So adorable! But so unaffected; so sincere. God wants us, as his children to be governable, and tenderhearted to His Spirit. To be harmless and unoffensive. To be humble as little children, who do not walk around like little elitists; “The child of a gentleman will play with the child of a beggar”, it has been said. Little children are void of arrogance and self-importance. Christ taught that we could certainly learn a lot from just watching a little child.

Now interesting to note, Christ does say that without this attribute, (humility) you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. In other words, unless the professing Christian shows signs that he is Christ’s, unless he has the life which backs up the profession, his faith is not genuine.

So how do we, from the heart, practice humility? Well, first and foremost we need to study the life of Christ and pray that we would be like him. We understand we are not to think more highly of ourselves than we ought to, and yet, we should know who we are, recognize the gifts and talents God has given and be thankful. To head toward the other extreme where one professes, as a Christian, to be the most worthless, insignificant, nonentity-void of anything good, useful, or worthy just becomes sanctimony-false humility, and hypocrisy. (I know a man like this-no matter when you give him the slightest compliment it is always, “No! No! Not me! I am nothing! I’m not worthy to walk the Lord’s earth!” etc. etc… He wants people to push back and tell him how wonderful he is. To put it in our everyday phraseology: he is fake news…)  We should:

• Apologize fully when we are wrong-
• Stop worrying about what others think of us and be concerned about what the Lord thinks of us-
• We should be light-
• We should strive to be salt –
• We should be courteous –
• An encourager-
• We should learn to be gracious in every situation and with all people.

Yes- All of these things.  But also, as a Christian:

Be astute-know the Word of God, know how to defend its truths and   principles. But also know how to walk in this world.

Be discerning about the company you keep. “Withdraw yourselves from every brother that walketh disorderly”. We have every prerogative based on the authority of God’s Word to do so. Not in an air of conceit or elitism-but with discernment and in sincerity, knowing we have a testimony to keep in sterling condition. We should walk in honesty before the lost. Let them see Christ in every word, every action.

Now who was among the disciples that day? We can assume that more than likely there were onlookers, probably the parents of the child our Lord called to him were nearby. Maybe even the father of the formerly possessed little boy. But Christ was preaching to the choir on this occasion. Those who professed to know him. And Judas was among them. One more occasion for Judas to hear the truth. One more opportunity for Judas to examine himself. Certainly, the tenderhearted disciples bore the rebuke and examined themselves, but Judas, so filled with pride and arrogance-he rejected it.

Essentially, Christ was instructing all his disciples that, unless you get over this pride thing fellas, there are some real questions about your authenticity. No one will even come close to the kingdom of heaven if pride is what defines him or her. There is great danger in pride. “It is the sin,” one last line from MH, “that turned the angels into devils.” And truly saved people loathe it in themselves.

The humblest Christians are the best ones for they are most like Christ and well capable to serve him in this world.

Thanks ever so much for reading!

Liz

“Posterity! You will never know how much it costs the present generation to preserve your freedom. I hope you will make a good use of it and if you do not-I shall repent in heaven that I ever took half the pains to preserve it.”

Posterity. Those who will come after, those who will live in the future. One’s descendants.

Christian parents need to seize some of John and Abigail’s fervor and vision when it comes to the nurturing and upbringing of their children. How both spiritually and doctrinally will they be equipped to face the future? Why doctrine? Because it is the embodiment of all we believe based on the Scriptures.

As Americans, we are aware that these are unprecedented times for us. John Adams, back in the late 1700s, looked forward to times of freedom, liberty, and great prosperity for this infant nation as it leaped out of its cradle and prevailed against the greatest army in the world. He envisioned a republic built on the principles of morality and religious liberty. But as we look around us at the condition of America today, we recall he also wrote: “Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.”

Here are some current facts about our country:

As new research emerges, the number of people who believe in God is shrinking every decade. Not to bore you with all this data, but we should understand that how much America has declined morally is specifically related to a lack of knowledge or belief in God.

According to the following Gallup polls: In the 1950’s and 60’s 96% of the US population claimed a strong belief in the God of the Bible-

Skip forward to the early to mid-teens 2000’s-the percentage of Americans who claimed a strong belief in the God of the Bible declined to 87%.

Last year a 2023 Gallup poll revealed the following: Only 51% of those polled in the US believe in God as described in the Scriptures.
22% affirmed they do not believe in God as described in the Scriptures but subscribe to some kind of higher power.

The remaining 27%-which is over ¼ of our population-indifferent.

What will the world be like in a few years or less? In Luke chapter eight our Lord made a profound statement concerning the last days, “ …Nevertheless when the Son of man cometh, shall he find faith on the earth?” Will there be conviction of the truth of anything? (according to Strongs) Any belief respecting man’s relationship to God? Any conviction that God exists and is the creator and ruler of all things, the provider and bestower of eternal salvation through Christ? Any reliance upon Christ for forgiveness of sins and eternal salvation? Will there be praying faith?

To my way of thinking, the most essential instruction, the most valuable influence parents can contribute to their children’s welfare and soundness of soul and spirit is a strong foundation in the Scriptures; both, by way of the content of the Scriptures and
equally as important for the parent who professes Christ, by way of behavior, conduct and lifestyle. Explaining, teaching, answering their questions. For example, give them a solid and accurate knowledge of:

God. Who is God? He is the Creator and Sustainer of everything. God is holy therefore he is without sin. God is love. He is perfect in all of his ways. He is perfectly good. God is almighty. God is truth. God takes care of us.

Of sin. What is sin? Sin is doing wrong. It is going against what God says is right. It is breaking God’s Law. It is hurtful and harmful, it is destructive. Sin is the cause of every terrible thing in the world. It is why we have disease, sickness, racism, crimes, and evil. But the biggest problem is we are sinful! Sin comes right from our hearts!

Jesus. Jesus Christ is the Son of the living God, the only means of our salvation. He never sinned. He was completely human and completely God. He came to save us from our sins. To bring us to God.

The Bible. The Bible is the inspired, infallible Word of God, and is accurate in everything it says. It does not contain the Word of God-it is the Word of God. It is the authority for Christian faith and practice and is the foundation on which believers must build their lives.

Make certain your children have a biblical understanding of salvation and their need of it-yet do not rush them into a prayer. Prepare them for the day they fully understand and will be saved-lay the foundation, line upon line, precept upon precept. Salvation cannot be some watered-down version of redemption- different for children than adults. These truths must be considered. If you, a personal worker, or some teacher pushes salvation on a child or plays into their emotions they will make a false profession. And that leads to confusion. Children are emotional beings. And some children are far more emotional than others. Some are just natural-born people pleasers so of course they want to please mommy, daddy, or the visiting speaker. If they are blessed enough to sit under sound preaching, they will hear preaching and teaching about such truths as the taking away of the saints or Hell. No child wants to imagine waking up one morning to find their parents have disappeared. The thought of going to hell will keep a child wide awake for nights! Truths such as the rapture or the fear of going to hell are incentives for salvation, but it is with an honest and good heart, Luke 8:15,
the heart’s knowledge of our sin against God and our separation from him that convicts us and convinces us that we need to be saved.

I have no doubt you want to have a Christ-centered home. However, attending a great church is not going to assure you of that. A great, strong Bible-believing Bible-preaching church is above and beyond an asset but you have got to do more than just attend faithfully. It is obedience to God’s Word and God’s plan for the structure within the home that brings these particular blessings to your family. Simply stated-when we obey-God blesses. This is a fixed principle in the Scriptures. No getting around it. It is a dominant theme throughout the Bible in the lives of the people whose stories are told there.

So what is your plan going to be? This is not something to take casually for we speak of eternal things. How will you be sure your children will be able to know how to stand in the future? Parents must:

I. Combat cultural influences now– Parents are all about safety these days. Locks on every kitchen cabinet, safety gates, organic everything, BPA-free water bottles, and on and on; but what about battling cultural influences all along the way? You cannot wait until your children are well into their teen years-you have to start when they are young. We are in a battle for the souls of our children in this country now more than ever. There are certain influences that are dangerous and you should be aware of them. Here is how you can protect your children:

A. Know your children-observe them-What are your child’s propensities toward the world? Some children could not care less-while others are very curious and typically they are very easily influenced by the world. Some children never waver from parental guidance, while others seem to be the types born with a clear idea of how they want their world to be operated, and an intolerance for those who disagree! Put up guardrails for your children. It should not matter what everyone else is doing, wearing, watching, or pursuing. You have got to set goals for your children. The Bible should be the Measure, the Standard for what you allow or do not allow in your child’s life-not what another Christian parent happens to permit for her child. This has everything to do with being a hands-on, eyes and ears wide open, godly mother. Don’t worry if you get labeled a “Helicopter mom.” Go a step further and be a Black Hawk mom!
Ignore the negativism the world attaches to the nurturing and protecting of your child. If you desire to raise God-fearing young people you have got your work cut out for you. Attend to it with all of your heart.

B. Know the people they look up to-Think with me: Who are you allowing in your children’s lives as their role models? Are they godly, upstanding Christians? If not, and you are promoting people who should not be endorsed, do not be surprised if they are the same ones who step into your child’s life one day, as the “understanding relative” to counsel them in opposition to your views. I have seen this repeatedly throughout the years of my husband’s ministry and even among our relatives. Some Christians have got to wake up and get over this “family is the end all” thing. It is not our relatives who merit our undying support and allegiance. We as Christians should be known for our authentic expressions of love and kindness, but you will never gain anything by compromising your testimony to please your relatives. And when it comes to your children, it would be naïve to believe, “After all, it’s family-what could go wrong?”
What I mean to say once more is no one should be closer to your child, no one should have more influence on them, and no one to whom your children should pour out their hearts more than you.

As for their friends, some kids can be very inauthentic in front of their friends’ parents, especially as they grow older. You know, Prince Charming when the parents are around and a devil behind their backs. Remember this: Kids need friends-it’s natural, it’s fun-but they don’t need them as much as they need you. Same with their cousins. Moreover, as they grow up friends can change seemingly overnight. Often for the worse. Your child could become disillusioned, hurt, and even begin to question some things for himself if that happens. So, listen to the conversations your children are having with their friends. Be within earshot. I am not implying that every friend or relative in your child’s life is a potential danger, but rather, if you have godly aspirations for your child, you must develop standards to protect them. Again, they do not need to be closer to their friends or their friend’s family than they are to you.

C. Create limitations so your kids are not rushed out of childhood. Permission to wear make-up, use the internet, have a phone, get a job, drive, etc. can change a child’s mind about a number of things, not the least of which is his or her parent’s intellect versus their own! Delaying these activities until your child displays an appropriate level of maturity enables you to use them as rites of passage that mark healthy progress toward adulthood. Pssst. Want to know the first sign of maturity? Respect for you. You are not your child’s friend. (Gasp!) You are the adult in the room. Though your child(ren) may seem emotionally mature and ready to take on the world they are not and cannot. And though it may seem they are making challenging arguments; rest assured-their brains are not fully formed yet and do not reach full maturation until they are in their mid-twenties. So you need to understand who you are dealing with, take a deep breath, and maintain your ground. When your child shows respect for you and your word they are moving in the right direction. However, you should model for them the way you want them to act with you. Even if the answer is still “no,” taking the time to graciously listen to their perspective can go a long way. And when a child/teen becomes, shall we say, disenchanted by your rules or decisions you must always remain calm and respond with the wisdom your years of life and experience have given you. It does not matter what the world says should happen at age 16 or 18. Some parents naively give in to the belief that “Oh, they’re 16-they have to get their permit…”. But why? My question would always be-is there a need right now? “No-but they want it.” So, do we give them candy for breakfast because they want it? As we set up stages and boundaries we give our children something to look forward to. It’s wrong thinking to believe you should give your child everything. Maturity and trustworthiness is a process-not something that automatically happens when the child turns eighteen.

The world’s assault on our children’s innocence is undisguised and blatant. It is increasingly intrusive and explicit-from TV, to music, to movies, and the internet. Children need years of innocence; days when good biblical and moral instruction can be established in their little, tender hearts. What great hope and promise for parents to know we have a Guide, an Intercessor, a Friend, and a Counselor all along the journey. James 1:5 encourages us:

“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally…”.

As for me, there is no “if”. I know I lack wisdom for all the perplexities of this life! What a blessing that all we have to do is ask! May the Lord greatly bless your every effort as you bring up your children in His School of nurturing and learning. I wish you a Varsity Letter!

Thank you so much for reading,

Liz

Possibly.

Peradventure.

Furthermore, invariably this misinformation gets into the hands-or should I say mouths- of those most eager to distribute it. Consequently, there are innocent people whose reputations would not be in question, culpable people whose reputations should be, and drama that would never erupt if people would not presume to entangle themselves by word or deed in other people’s affairs. Cricket, cricket…

I can speak with intelligence and experience to this matter because I am married to a pastor, which, by affiliation makes me a Pastor’s wife, (no self-aggrandizing-just rolling up my sleeves like everyone else…) and let me assure you-“We know a thing or two because we’ve seen a thing or two!” (And boy oh boy oh boy could I tell you stories that would make your hair stand up on end about the conduct of some professing Christians!) Nonetheless, if some think my observations are somewhat pronounced, they may be surprised to learn what the Word of God says about this subject, as the Bible teaches us that a Christian’s love for Christ is evidenced by how we speak to, love, and care for one another. In the Bible, many phrases characterize those who do not refrain from causing division and trouble with their words: a whisperer, a talebearer, a backbiter, corrupt communicators, a hypocrite, those with lying lips, slanderers, those who disobey the ninth commandment, and more. In all cases, we are admonished to keep from doing it. Equally as wrong is slander because its sole purpose is to spread information deliberately intended to damage the reputation of another. It is an abusive attack on a person’s character or good name.

However, I am addressing this article to those of us who strive to be good Christians, and who want to move on to higher ground. And just to prove my heart is in the right place before I go one step further, a mortifying anecdote by way of personal illustration-insert grimacing emoji here:

When I was a young Christian, I had a friend named Sheila who was a great new convert in Christ. One of those, “I got it-I get it-I’m sold out” types of new converts. At the time, my husband was in Bible College, and we were poorer than the poorest church mice. Our meager income was distributed in the following ways: Tithe, missions, rent, Bible-College tuition, gas, Pampers-Pampers-Pampers, and if there was anything left a few groceries. Sheila and I had a mutual friend whose family had a windfall financially. I forget the exact details now, but I know the family went from living in the “Mouse Tenement District” with us to a better place for them. Sheila was so excited for them and began telling me the good news. Forthwith, the envious, green-eyed monster in me blurted out, “Oh wow. Must be nice…,” which was such a gossipy thing to say for I did not mean it as a compliment. Sheila just looked at me and in that beautiful, untainted way that is so typical of a brand spanking new convert of Christ, she just kind of cocked her head and very nicely said, “Well, that didn’t sound like it was salted just right.” She was referring to Colossians 4:6, “Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.” I was so ashamed at the time I just wanted to crawl right back into my mouse hole, but you see it was good for me because forty-something years later I remember how those words pierced my soul for good. To this day I love her for the gentle rebuke and so many other things.

What is it that induces or provokes some people to speak uncharitably about others and why do some always seem to have the lowdown on everybody? Moreover, what then drives them to broadcast that information? Likely, it could be motivated by jealousy, or insecurity, as people who must put others in a bad light are under the illusion that doing so somehow raises their status. (But it never does.) Some, however, as the Bible tells us, are just busybodies and talebearers who cannot resist inserting their noses into others’ affairs. Additionally, they often have no real knowledge of what happened or what is being presented but they just “jump on the bandwagon.” Funny-this old expression. The first usage of this phrase can be found in his autobiography “The Life of P.T. Barnum, Written by Himself”, which he wrote in 1855. Circuses were very skilled at attracting the public by having an exciting parade roll through town, complete with a highly decorated bandwagon. And even though the circus actors on the wagon included those whom the average person back in the mid-1800s would consider disreputable- (women who were not exactly appropriately clothed, strange and peculiar performers such as magicians, snake charmers, or those completely covered with tattoos, etc.)- when people heard and saw the wagon coming they would drop everything and follow along-some would even hop on with not one clue as to where they were headed! And the bandwagon metaphor still exists today. Chirp…chirp…

Now, what is so interesting to note about the membership of the Lord’s churches is that God, throughout his Word, chose to use sheep to portray his children. It certainly was not a random choice, of course, knowing God is a God of order and precision. He likens his children to sheep for a reason, so here are the facts…about us!

Overall, most sheep have such a lovely nature. They love to flock and have God-given strong flocking instincts, for sheep have no defense against predators, so they find safety in numbers. Most love to be together. Most love to have their local shepherd nearby. Where he leads them, most will follow. They tend to be a bit skittish; any loud noise or sign of trouble sends them directly to the shepherd. They adore the peacefulness of still waters and have an affinity for quiet, green pastures.

However, sometimes they can get into trouble when, instead of listening to the shepherd, they follow what the next sheep is doing! In 2006, in eastern Turkey, a shepherd reported the death of over 400 of his sheep. One of them just on impulse, apparently not satisfied with the grass where he was feeding, attempted to jump across a 150-foot-deep ravine…and missed.

And all the other sheep followed!

Sometimes there will be one, or a few among the flock that shepherds identify as “head-butters.” Did you know sheep have thick skulls? Truly, they do! Sheepherders and ranchers will tell you one way to stop this head-butting thing early on is to avoid petting and coddling the head-butters. Also, it is recommended that a good splash of cold water right in their faces will help them to snap out of it momentarily…(soooo many analogies here, I can hardly take it!) It requires a lot of patience on the part of the shepherd to get through to some of them. Hmmmm…) Shepherds must beware of these guys because once one gets into their head-butting mode, they can become most aggressive and do damage!

Also, according to shepherds, sometimes there are those within the flock that cannot be trusted! One shepherd down in Lancaster County, Pa. said, “It is always important to know who and where the “head-butters” are and whatever you do- never turn your back on them. It is both a natural and learned behavior in sheep.” Speaking as a sheep myself just give me the shepherd, still waters, and green pastures for the rest of my life and deliver me from the head-butters! And while we’re on the subject of head-butters, they can be influencers as well! That is why the shepherd keeps his eye on them. As mentioned earlier, sheep like to flock and follow one another. Within the church, there are from time to time those who take their hard-headedness one step further by stepping over the shepherd entirely (ewe crazy?!)and brazenly interfering in some poor, unsuspecting sheep’s life by counseling or reprimanding them, upsetting some sheep to the place where he or she will even leave the church! Well, as the ancient Roman writer Plautus used to say, “Where there are sheep, the wolves are never very far away.”

Consider with me for a moment if you would be so kind, we are privileged in our church family to have among us some of New York’s Finest, and they are terrific guys. Intelligent, discerning men with beautiful wives and families. And yet-even they-with all of their credentials and qualifications-even they do not police the church! Well, why of course they wouldn’t! They know what the Bible says!

“And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ:” Well, the Apostles and prophets are long gone. And the evangelists are out on the mission fields. That just leaves the Pastor and teachers. We have one Pastor and some exceptionally good men appointed by him to teach and or preach. God will lay it on the heart of the true Pastor-(not a hireling)-as the ordained under-shepherd of the Lord’s church-to begin to confront someone should the need arise. Never once does that verse or any other verse in the Bible permit fellow church members to accuse and straighten out another member. Imagine the mayhem! Never ever. Matters often come to the attention of a loving pastor and either he will prayerfully address a straying or erring sheep as the Lord leads or he will rely on someone spiritually capable to do so. This is the biblical way of dealing with problems within the church. Often, the pastor knows more of the “back story” so he may not be quite as eager as the church member who wants to take the law into his or her own hands. I have heard and witnessed some outrageous stories about women in churches and how they wronged another church member…all in the name of “Christianity” you know…and it’s a shame.

Members of Bible-believing, Bible-preaching churches are to approach each other in love and honor. And as the wonderful Book of Romans instructs us, “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.” Romans 12:8. God knows there will be personality differences, relationship problems, and dealings with those who are not exactly the embodiment of honesty. And so we do our best, “Everything,” as the dear Matthew Henry has said, “with an eye toward Christ.” According to the Word of God, it is always better to be reserved in our assessments of someone or some situation rather than to be presumptuous. After all, we could be wrong.

In closing, let me affirm that the Lord’s church is a very special place, like no other. We willingly place ourselves under the leadership of a pastor who does not rule by his own merits or by his design but as a loving servant of Christ, the Chief Shepherd, “Who is, “the head over all things to the church, Which is his body, the fulness of him that filleth all in all.”

We meet someone as perfect strangers and as the years go by we often become the dearest of friends closer than relatives! We babysit one another’s children or teach them in Sunday School. Our kids call their friend’s parents aunt or uncle, and someone else’s grandmother regards our children as one of their own. We care for one another and bring meals for those who are sick or struggling. We share holidays, hopes, heartbreaks, and prayer requests. We sit next to the same person in church or choir for years and follow the faith and leadership of our wise and loving pastor. And as people come and go life keeps perfect time though we don’t even realize how hastily it is passing, often taking us by surprise. And we recognize what a privilege it is to belong to this holy company! We are inseparably and eternally bound together. Therefore, our love and loyalty to each other ought to make disunity unthinkable! Called saints, holy ones, as the Spirit of God led the writers to name us over fifty times in the New Testament, may we endeavor to live up to that calling.
Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.” Ephesians 3:21

Thank you for the time you took to read this,

Liz

One of the distinguishing marks of the converts of Christ is the way in which they view the events of their lives. To trust in the Lord and as a Christian sincerely profess, that regardless of what comes my way throughout my life I know God has either allowed it or designed it, and he is sovereign over all the occurrences of my life, speaks of a solid, strong, and stable Christian.

Solid because the way a believer comes to terms with trials, our behavior as we pass through them(and we will pass through them) very often reveals our spiritual condition.

Strong because trials-the heating up, the burning (1 Peter 4:12), the testing and proving (1 Peter 1:7) of our faith accomplishes a purer and stronger faith and Christian character.

And I use the word stable because younger Christians (and sometimes older ones who ought to be more mature in the faith) can tend to whine and complain about anything difficult or disagreeable that comes their way. As incongruous as it may sound, the twists and turns, the vicissitudes of life produce steady Christians.

As God’s children, we believe God is the Creator and Sustainer of everyone and everything. He is perfect in all of his attributes, and God is love. Because God is love he has provided a way for us to be saved from our sin and the misery it causes. We also understand according to the Bible that God has a wonderful plan for our lives: “For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son.”

God, in his loving plan of salvation, not only determined to save and forgive us, but that through salvation we would be the blessed recipients throughout our lives of his divine workmanship in purposing to make us like his Son, Jesus. Therefore, regardless of what comes our way we can always have the confidence that God is with us, for us, and at all times at work in our lives. Moreover, in the process he is continually working for our good.

We pray throughout our Christian lives to be people of faith.      Great faith. Unwavering faith. We know that faith comes from the Word of God. But there is another way by means of which strong faith is developed, and that is through great trials. Deep trials. Our friend Spurgeon once said:

“Trials teach us what we are; they dig up the soil and let us see what we are made of.” Yes indeed…

Last summer, after all of my years of attempting to raise a garden I finally succeeded-to the extent that by summer’s end I produced so much of a bumper crop of tomatoes, cucumbers and zucchinis, for weeks I was bringing baskets full to church to share with my good brothers and sisters…some of whom-right along with my own family– were laughing a little too hard in their complete astonishment at my success-(insert mortified emoji-the one with two dashes for the eyes and one for the mouth). And I believe the key to my success came through a little conversation I had one day with my good friend, Danielle. Danielle who, for years now, has produced gardens which rival the Royal Botanical Gardens in England. “It’s your soil, Liz,” she simply advised me one day. So I filled my little garden plot with hundreds of pounds-literally- of good, rich, organic soil-and voila! A garden that actually grew and produced wonderful fruit! Soil matters! You have to dig around and make sure it is not insufficient. The process of growing in faith, of having our faith increase is never easy. Why? Simply because true faith requires complete surrender to whatever may be God’s will for our lives and complete confidence in him throughout the process.

Interestingly, Jesus identified only two people in His earthly ministry who He said had great faith; a Roman centurion (Matthew 8:5–13)and a Canaanite woman (Matthew 15:21–28).The shared commonality between them was their great humility in their approach to Christ. Christ marveled at it. Matthew Henry said, “Great humility leads to great faith.”

God knows we are prone to be fearful and fretful creatures at times. Nevertheless, in God’s Word we are given examples of those who endured trying and terrifying trials and attained great faith through them. Great faith is so honoring to God. Fearfulness and the sense of being overwhelmed is always due to a loss of confidence in him. Alongside this, it is also the lack of believing that, should everything not go the way I planned-then God has a better plan. Without the belief that the events of our lives are in God’s hands life becomes a very fearful, uncertain existence, void of the comfort, direction and hope prayer accompanied by faith in God brings. You see, the object is not to understand the “whys” and “how comes” of all of the tests and tribulations. The purpose is that Christians grow in faith to the place where they rest in the indisputable fact that all the issues of their lives are under God’s control. He sees. He is watching, and he is always at work. And that is a place of peace, and comfort, and a source of great assurance for all of us as we wholeheartedly believe that “My loving heavenly Father, Who is concerned about the life cycle of a sparrow, cares much more about me than I really understand.” Amen.

So the process involved in becoming like our Lord is often trying, yet the Apostle Peter encourages us that the process is more precious than gold which perishes because God will receive glory from it!

James reminds us that the trial of our faith develops patience in us. Patience is steadfast endurance, waiting. (Did you know that waiting is a predominant principal and a spiritual discipline in the life of a Christian? It is referenced in 116 verses in God’s Word!)

I can only speak for myself but waiting is when the fretting comes. Waiting is hard. And you have to be incredibly careful in the process-no moves by you until God moves, for fear that you will dash off and make either an untimely decision or a disastrous one which could change the course of your life!

We need to mature in our faith in God by developing a strong and sound belief in each great truth of God’s Word, and a resolute adherence to them, especially in times of trial.  God considers the weight load before he allows trials and tests in our lives.  And He knows what we can manage. Now, often we do not think we can manage it-nevertheless, there is a conforming to the image of Christ for every genuine child of God, and aren’t we the better for it?

Thank you so much for reading!

Liz

Shamefacedness is one. It means to carry oneself with a sense of modesty and respect regarding our behavior before others. In using the word “shamefacedness”, the Bible makes a statement about a woman’s proper demeanor.

Chaste is a word found in Titus 2:5 among a list of instructions for women, which ends with these thundering words, “That the word of God be not blasphemed.”  “Failures in such relative duties” says the great Matthew Henry, “would be greatly to the reproach of Christianity. ‘What are these the better for this-their new religion?’ would the infidels be ready to say.”  Chaste speaks of being innocent, pure and clean from the world. To develop good personal Christian character.

Virtuous is found three times in God’s Word-every time directed to women-worthy, strong, brave-a competent homemaker. The phrase, Keepers at home directed only to women-simply means domestically inclined. That the home be orderly, clean, and run efficiently-a reflection of your efforts. A warm and welcoming home.

And since we are on the topic of things which have a beautiful and orderly appearance, it goes without saying that we ought to take care of ourselves as well. I imagine most hard-working men, though happy enough to come home to a clean, orderly home and the aroma of dinner cooking in the oven, would, in addition, like to come home to a woman who has invested in herself as well. Even when you are having a “tear into the house spring cleaning” kind of day. Invest in yourself-look nice-take the time. It really matters. It is the icing on his cake when everything else is in order in a household for your husband to walk through the front door and be welcomed by a class act of a wife.

But not only for that reason.

Sometimes you can lose yourself– as if to say, “What does it matter?    I have taken care of everyone and everything today.” But it does matter. A parenting truism is that the days may be long, but the years are short. The foundation of your child’s character is laid in those days when they are home with you. Your love, influence and example will live in your children’s hearts forever.  And both girls and boys are affected greatly by how their mothers take care of themselves. It’s true.

But what if you are a woman whose responsibilities do not include a home and family to care for, or maybe the days of raising your children are, to a large extent, over? It is every bit as important and, in all respects, as meaningful-take the time to invest in yourself.

You know girls, there is lot of nonsense out there in the name of Christianity which has absolutely no foundation in the Word of God but is mere opinion. I think one “myth” that has morphed into certain schools of thought is that as long as all the kids are fed and homeschooled, as long as the house is somewhat in order-then that is all that matters. Almost as if there is some kind of “merit” attached to a woman who lets herself go in favor of working overtime with her kids, the house or even a job. But you know this just by looking at creation all around you-God is a God of beauty and order. Our presentation, if you will, matters at home, before our friends and family, and before the world. It goes along with our Christianity. The Virtuous woman was renowned wherever she went-not only because of her works-which were exemplary-but because of her appearance and demeanor.

We are also instructed to be good. Good-in opposition to ungodliness-kind, helpful and charitable in all things, with a cheerful spirit. Not pouty or sullen, not a troublesome kind of woman. Just a blessing-adding quality wherever she goes!

So yes, we ought to strive to fulfil these directives for that is what they are. These are not tips, hints, or little suggestions. If we genuinely want to please the Lord, we need to consider our ways.

Now. There is a tendency among young women today to be divas. Even among professing Christian women-gasp! And truly, in their defense, it has a lot to do with the influences of the culture in which they were raised. Spoiled. Pampered. Overindulged. Excessive. Allow me to explain.

The word diva is the feminine form of the Latin term divus, which meant “god.” And indeed, these women behave as though they are little goddesses prancing around. In English, diva came to refer to a female performer, an actress, known for being “a vain, temperamental, and demanding person who had difficulty working well with others.” Hmmmmm…Christian divas? Sounds like an oxymoron to me.

In today’s self-absorbed, superficial culture, diva attitudes are celebrated. Women are bombarded with “counsel” on all social media platforms that tell us that we “deserve the best” and that as women-“nothing is too good” for us. Life is soooooo hard for women, sooooooo demanding for mothers…Therefore, you need to be pampered and indulged. In fact-you need to be over indulged! So, this is how you should live, these are the superior skin and haircare products, this is what you need if you are preparing to get married, this is how you behave when you’re expecting, this is what people need to understand about you after you have a baby, and you need to have all these things because-whatever the case is-it’s all about you! As long as everyone understands that you are the most important person in the room!

Now just think with me for a minute. Let’s consider former generations of women throughout American history. Let’s narrow it down to, say, the women who survived and thrived during the Great Depression. Did you know that overall, it was the women who held the family together during those profoundly challenging and heartbreaking years? Many men just walked away from their families and deserted their wives and children out of feeling disgraced and hopeless. This came to be known as “A poor man’s divorce.” It is estimated that more than two million men became traveling hobos-riding the railways… So, what did the impoverished women they left behind do? All their energy and spirit was devoted to survival, and to feeding and educating their children. So, they rolled up their sleeves and did it. It was a very selfless generation.

(Incidentally, their children were not provided with countless sensory fidget toys to deal with the stress of going hungry or shoeless. Likely they went outside after school, and if they were fortunate enough to have a small rubber ball among their treasures, they would find a good stick with which to whack it, or go sit down somewhere and clack two rocks together…but I digress…)

What a pull the world can have on us if the Bible is not our greatest and foremost treasure in this life!

The world is setting the standard which, in my opinion is at an all-time low for women, and professing Christian women do themselves great harm in striving for the world’s high-water mark. Why would we not examine all these philosophies in light of the Word of God before we adopt them as our own?

The diva’s attitude always shows up when a diva does not get her way, or when she believes she deserves more than she is receiving. Divas learn incredibly early on to manipulate authority-particularly their fathers or husbands- with tears, tantrums, and threats. Astoundingly, these girls somehow manage to snag some prince of a guy and the next thing you know he is engaging in acrobatics trying to please her. Behaving like a diva is never honoring to God.  Divas are often at the root of conflict, gossip, and even church troubles because they will not receive correction. Divas can create chaos in the home or the church. Giving people the cold shoulder because she did not get her way. One thing all divas have in common is an extraordinarily elevated opinion of themselves and their way of doing things. This behavior is completely contradictory to the teaching of our Lord, and we have to understand there is a strategy by our unseen enemy to turn us away from the Scriptures to the world’s philosophy.  Consider the case of the diva wife. The Bible addresses this as well with deeply convicting verses:

“It is better to dwell in the corner of a housetop than with a brawling(one who causes strife and contention) woman in a wide house.” Proverbs 21:9

“A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious(quarrelsome) woman are alike. Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, And the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself. “ Proverbs 27:15

To have a wife such as this is grievous to a man in that there is no pleasing her and no concealing her. “A wise man would hide her if he could,” says Matthew Henry, “for the sake both of his own and his wife’s reputation, but he cannot, any more than he can conceal the noise of the wind when it blows or the smell of a strong perfume.” Ouch.  Now, would you believe divas are not necessarily a product of the 21st century? The early churches had their share of them as well! There were women whose names will forever be on the pages of Holy Writ because of their conduct! Here is just one example:  “I beseech Euodias, and beseech Syntyche, that they be of the same mind in the Lord.” Phil. 4:2

What would it have been like to be present in the service on the first Sunday morning that letter was read to the believers at the church at Philippi? The parchment from Paul arrived, and those early followers of Jesus were likely gathered in someone’s house, eager to hear the words the Apostle had written down for them. And what a letter! A treasure from the start, centered on our Lord. An epistle filled with wise counsel, rich doctrine, and beautiful truths which would encourage the hearts of the believers. But near the end, Paul called out two women in the church by name: Euodia and Syntyche. (Insert grimacing emoji). Evidently these two Christian women were not getting along. And apparently, whomever pastored the church at Philippi was troubled enough about it to relay the information to the Apostle Paul! No doubt the good pastor of the Church at Philippi had counseled them and addressed their behavior yet, it appears the pastor’s word was not good enough for them. The Apostle Paul is addressing these women publicly. Can you imagine! He, in essence, is instructing the pastor to relay this message to Euodias and Syntyche- “Plead with them from me to be of the same mind in the Lord, to keep the peace and live in love, to be of the same mind one with another, not bickering and mistreating each other. How would you like to have been Euodias and Syntyche sitting there that morning? (Incidentally, unity is an identifier in the Lord’s churches…so is disunity.)

In life when we identify a problem, we can endeavor to fix it, correct? So, what are the main challenges with divas?  Divas are self-focused and self-important, so they require constant attention. Divas expect things to go their way and when they do not there is needless drama. They tend to be emotional roller coasters-what makes one person sad has the diva sobbing. Divas are the great justifiers of their bad conduct.

Overall, doesn’t this sound like such selfish, childish behavior? Yet, the greater question becomes, is there hope for her?       If she is a true convert, yes. The Lord will not allow her to live in such a way. She must look to the Word of God and compare the way she is living to what it teaches. We cannot blame our upbringing, our parents or even our ethnicity! I am part Italian, part German and part Irish. In my family there were Italian hotheads-German hardheads and Irish naughty mouths…to put it mildly. When I got saved, I understood those shameful behaviors would have no place in my life-and to blame my sinful conduct on my ethnicity would just be a ridiculous excuse. We forsake our culture when we come to Christ and embrace the Christian culture-and thank the Lord for that!  God’s Word is the Standard. In it God has established the measure of excellence for women. What we owe God can never be repaid, such is the weight of our debt to him for all he has given and done for us. Understanding we are accountable for our attitudes and actions as Christians, may the Lord enable us to continually aspire toward higher ground.

Thank you so much for reading!

Liz

By watching I discern those little sparrows have learned a thing or two from their Creator. Flitting about from treetop to treetop, swooping down to snatch up a stray chicken feather with which they will feather their nests. Dining, drinking, diving; these tiny things blithely splash around in the puddles left by the sprinkler or an early morning rain shower. Sparrows hop rather than walk on the ground, staying close within their crowded flocks, sometimes squabbling over crumbs or seeds on the ground-the essential tidbits of their lives. Yet, as harmless as they seem, they are fierce protectors of their nests! Brave, intrepid, teeny creatures, I have seen them charge after hawks many times their size! (Hawks…another species our chickens have inadvertently drawn to the coop. Insert grimacing emoji.)

They are also such social little things, flocking together in times of distress as I observed one bright winter’s morning recently. The sun had only just come up as I hurried over to the coop in the chill of the December air to let the chickens out for the day.  Immediately I became aware of a sort of ruckus near the coop-sparrows crying and flying all about one certain spot of the chicken wire fencing which surrounds the run. And then I saw why. One little sparrow had gotten himself entangled in the chicken wire. He was flapping his wings and crying to break his heart (well, okay-I mean-I think he was crying-there were no tears or anything…but that is what it seemed like to me…like remember when Peter rabbit got caught under the fence?

Umm…never mind) and about two dozen or so sparrows were in such a state of distress, flying around him as if to exhort him to try harder. As soon as I approached they began to squawk and cry all the louder and then-in a moment-in a flurry of feathers and fluff- all of them flew off and just forsook him there, settling themselves at a safe distance from me in the uppermost branches of a nearby oak tree, looking down in utter silence. The poor little thing was in such a mighty struggle for his life that I wondered just for a moment if there might be some way I could help him. Had my grandson Bear been nearby, he would have easily come to the rescue. But I am a chicken when it comes to birds-the whole wings flapping thing and all, so instead I just stood by helplessly and watched. Within a few moments he finally ceased to struggle and just lay there panting, his tiny chest heaving up and down so rapidly I thought he would explode. Total silence now, not even a peep from the chickens who quietly pecked at the feed scattered near my feet.  “Poor thing,” thought I. But then, just as I supposed he was done for, he simply slipped out and freed himself! He soared straight up to where his audience sat perched upon the branches. And there he sat among them- every single one of them in silence now. I looked up at them. They looked down at me.     I felt as if had there been a “spokes-sparrow” among them he would have tweeted, “There now! You thought it was all over, didn’t you! Now what do you think of that!” And I would have had to agree.          

I decided that possibly my presence was preventing their return so I quickly went back to the warmth of our sun-filled back room.  Within a few moments the sparrows lifted off their lofty heights descending on the yard once more and continued to nibble and peck at the tidbits left behind by the chickens, and life, for them, returned to normal.

And I found myself wondering if the voice of instinct placed within that little sparrow by his loving Creator had inspired him to stop all of that flapping, all of the struggle and just calm down and wait. For it was only when he composed himself that he found freedom and quite effortlessly, at that. After all that crying, squawking, and flapping. After all the attention and imploring of his-well, “friends”…but what kinds of friends were they really? I mean they all forsook him! Just flew off knowing full well some stray cat could have come skulking along and finished him off! Thanks for nothing guys!

Nevertheless, I found myself wondering how he got in there in the

first place. However did he get caught in one of the holes of the chicken wire? What was he thinking! That he could just slip through and get away with it? Was he attempting a short cut instead of taking the time to do things the right way? Well, as they say, no trouble like homemade trouble!

Be that as it may, all is well that ends well I suppose. Nonetheless I would imagine that little sparrow was going to have one of the best sleeps of his life that evening! Considering what could have happened-but did not.

Composure, I concluded, was the key. Not to panic or be influenced by those around you who may be panicking for you! To be still-well, at least as still as is possible when your heart becomes your own worst enemy as it pounds and beats away at one-hundred miles an hour and your mind is like someone locked in a room who goes around pushing against every door and window in order to escape.

Yes. Those little beings have learned a thing or two from their Creator:

Stop all of the flapping.

Rest a while.

Compose yourself.      

Then remember what you know to be true about these kinds of occurrences:      

Some friends help when they stay, others when they leave-your hope is not in them.

Do not be distracted by what you think is going to happen. All of the disastrous outcomes. In particular do not be distracted by what you determine should happen-especially when it does not.

Catch your breath.

Remember Who is in control.

Wait on Him.

“But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.” Luke 12:7

Thank you for reading,

Liz

One of the richest blessings a Christian discovers is that life-throughout all stages– has tremendous meaning, purpose, and incomparable fulfillment in Christ. The Bible clearly teaches this and those who are saved can wholly testify to this truth. And what a gracious gift that is! As we serve the Lord and are led by his Spirit, how much quality we can add to the lives of others. What assets to the Lord’s church we can be! To be a true Christian who lives with no anticipation of praise, no hidden motives, and no expectation of reciprocation. One whose only prayer at the close of each day is, “Oh Lord, did I by thy grace, love you and serve you with all my heart today? Was I pleasing in thy sight?” Who finds their relationship with Christ more fulfilling and rewarding than anything the world has to offer.

Now we find ourselves at that final chapter time of year, when you kind of peek ahead and count the pages you have left, and you find yourself thinking, “Wait-this is it? How can all of these matters be resolved with just a handful of lines left in the story?”

Whenever I arrive at the end of a book I do exactly the same thing: I close it and just stare at it for a while. I never simply lay it aside and think, “Well, that’s the end of that-on to the next one…” No.  Maybe I am too sentimental, but the way I see it, I have spent a considerable amount of time with that soft covered companion of mine, having met at the same time nightly, and I have learned I simply need to

think about it for a while longer before I let it go.  For I have found those first few moments after I have read the closing lines to be so evocative. Like saying goodbye to someone you are not going to see for a really long time. Actually you have no idea if you will see them again.  And even if you imagine you are going to see them soon-what do you know? We can make all kinds of plans, but plans change.              Every goodbye we say is, well, for me anyway, so significant, even monumental, and yet, there’s never enough time to say it. There is always a plane to catch or a car with its engine running, waiting to take that person away.  And when the book is over, or the person is gone well, I need to think about these events and people for a while.

I view the closing of the year in a similar fashion. I need to reflect upon it-the great times and the not-so-great times. The people who have come in and out of our lives. The ones we never expected to see, and regrettably, the ones we will not see again. I look around me as a Christian and take immense pleasure in the things that are exactly the same, beginning with the unwavering faithfulness of my loving Heavenly Father and the veracity of his Word. The steadfast love and godliness of a husband who has comforted me, counseled me, and led me by his great Christ-like example, whose faith I still follow after all these years-forty-seven to be exact. A loving son who has the unique ability of being everything I need him to be at the moment I need him most and a favorite son-in-law who is a son, a treasured friend, and a prince of preachers. Two daughters who have at all times been my dearest, loving, closest friends and confidants and will remain so forever. A gentle and gracious daughter-in-law whose smile can light up a room. A beautiful, first-born granddaughter who, knowing I love her so deeply and miss her so achingly, took it upon her amazing self to fly alone for the first time in her life, on her 19 th birthday, to spend it with me here in New York. I will never forget that as long as I live. Our youngest granddaughter, who by her delicious wit and sincere tenderheartedness has endeared herself so profoundly to each and every member of our family that we all unanimously agree- everybody needs a Molly in their life. Four grandsons with whom I have such camaraderie and connection, who, by their antics and comedy have made me laugh out loud more times than I can number, yet by their tenderheartedness to the things of the Lord have caused me to weep with gratefulness to God. And as if these loved ones were not ample     blessings in my life, in addition, I am surrounded and influenced by

my beloved and esteemed brothers and sisters in Christ the Lord has         placed in his church, who weave their ways in and out of my life all through the year; blessing me, encouraging me, working side by side with me-sharing burdens and blessings, wisdom and wit- and for whom I have so much love and respect as I watch them grow in Christ and continue to be assets to the Lord’s church. I know the full measure of what they have added to our lives will only be discovered in eternity.

At the close of the year I often find myself looking right back to the beginning when it all started. Who would have ever thought this or that would happen, or that it would end this or that way? And yet, as a Christian I can look back on it all and see the faithfulness of the Lord. The only true constant. How he took care of everything I was so worried about. How he helped me to think spiritually about situations I may have feared and enabled me to have victory over heartaches. I marvel at all of the answered prayer! His faithfulness has provided for me time and time again and his steadfast presence in my life has guided me and proved that blessed assurance, Jesus is mine.

I comprehend once more as I have at this time every year, that I am a debtor to my Lord, as over and over again he has taught me that the primary objective in life, the principal thing, the most fulfilling and rewarding significance of life is that we were designed to bring glory to Christ. Every moment we live. Every life we touch. Every event we encounter-anything and everything with an eye toward Christ. To add quality to the lives of others by becoming who the Word of God has taught us and the Spirit of God enables us to be.  To possess an excellent spirit which enables us to be a benefit to the Lord’s church. To bless our dear friends and loved ones and even at times-our enemies! I would say that is a full order! Always bearing in our minds,“…forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord.”

As we look to 2024, we anticipate bright and blessed days. The babies who are crawling today will be running around next year at this time. Our children and grandchildren will continue to grow and learn and bring us such happiness. The winter will pass and soon someone will say that the robins are back-those hippity-hopping harbingers of spring.  And the year will go on and on.  And I think, in light of it all,

that we are richer than we know, as throughout each and every season of our lives the unfailing understanding, kindness and boundless love of our Heavenly Father presides, more constant than the stars in their courses.

Thank you for reading,

Liz